Week 7

 I had such a productive week. I finally got around to doing the chores I’ve been putting off. I deep cleaned my car. I’ve been avoiding it for weeks, but I feel so much less stressed with my car declutterred. I cleaned out my room too, and having a mess-free space has helped me feel less worried about my upcoming college deadlines. 

I celebrated my friend’s debut on Saturday. I haven’t seen my old classmates in a minute. I was scared that it would be awkward, but it really wasn’t that bad.

My Halloween costume isn’t coming in time. I was going to do a matching costume with my friend where I was Light and he was Ryuk from death note. I’m going to have to get a costume together from the clothes I already have. 

I’m grateful for my 87 on the history exam, my boss not noticing I was late to work, and getting the perfect pumpkin at the pumpkin patch.

extra blog 2

 Sometimes it feels like I'm going through the motions. I have so many amazing things in my life, but I lose sight of those gifts when I'm always looking for the next big event. I decided to take steps to appreciate some of the amazing things in my life.

I started keeping a gratitude journal. It's not a real journal, it's more of a series of notes in my notesapp. It's the thought that counts. Every night I pick a minimum of 3 things that made my day a little better. I try to challenge myself by never saying the same thing twice. I could write about my amazing friends and family, but if I can only write about them once then I begin to focus more on the little things. Small conversations with strangers, gas being a little cheaper, and other seemingly insignificant details have a bigger impact on me. 

I intend to start writing about my gratitude journal in the blogs. My blogs are normally streams of consciousness, with very little editing. I like getting my thoughts onto the paper without worrying about the formatting or grammar. I think selecting my top few choices from my gratitude journal and writing about those will help me maintain more structure.

extra blog 1

My boss hired a new employee yesterday. I work an office job, and the only other people I work with are two older coworkers and my boss. They're very kind, but it's hard to maintain a conversation with them since they have kids my age. The new employee is a college student, also planning on studying law. We hit it off, and I'm excited to finally have someone to talk to at work.

I miss working with people my age. I didn't like my old job, but I enjoyed talking to customers sometimes. Working in an office is a lot easier, but it's isolating. I sit alone at my desk for hours, and phone calls with attorneys are my only opportunity to have a pleasant conversation. It's a major improvement though. I don't miss my old job. I don't miss smelling like grease, I don't miss rude customers, and I don't miss the crappy pay. I guess every job has sacrifices.

Week 6

 I started reading a few other student's blogs. I feel a lot more comfortable writing my blogs. I'm scared to over share too much in these blogs, and I realized that most classmates write about their weekend, fun events, and school stress. 

I'm having the week from hell. I lost my wallet, and after ripping apart my entire house and car I still had no luck. I now have to spend my Saturday morning at the bank and DMV, getting a new card and license. I'm missing work from my classes. My boss is back after having the flu and she's been giving me huge floods of paperwork that I need to file. The past few days I've stayed late at work to catch up. 

I normally love Halloween. It's my favorite holiday. I can't get into the Halloween spirit this year. It doesn't feel like October, and I haven't done any of the usual apple picking or haunted houses I would normally do in October. Hopefully by the end of the month I feel more in the Halloween spirit.

Week 4

 I realized I'm outgrowing my friend group. Every time I hang out with them in a group setting I find myself irritable. I feel drained so easily. It's nothing they've done, I think we're just growing apart. I've grown to heavily prefer one-on-one time with my friends. I went on a trip to NYC with my friend over the weekend and I really enjoyed my time with him. It felt freeing going in any store we wanted and leaving when we were done without having to worry about 8 other people who also want to look around. When I spent time with my friend group the next day I found that I was impatient and frustrated. They often spent 40+ minutes in stores the size of a shed. I know I'm not a patient person. Every time I feel slightly tired, hungry, or irritated I shut down. Sometimes even when I'm enjoying spending time with my friends I'll completely stop talking. I'm not mad or anything, just tired and a lot of the time the person I'm with assumes I'm mad or bored. It's a flaw I'm trying to work on. Even in New York I started shutting down. I love travelling, but I felt drained from the heat, walking, and crowds. I know everyone gets like this sometimes, but I get tired at events I really shouldn't get tired at. I'm an active person, and I normally get okay sleep but it's like the second I have a fun event I turn into a zombie. It ruins the fun. I get fatigued whether I'm going to a small local shop or walking 15k steps in 85 degree heat. I think I'm going to stop going to group events